Monday, November 19, 2007

Monday morning



Over the weekend, in the middle of the freakout I have been experiencing, I also got bitten by the bug that's infected so many bloggers. I started to wonder why am I doing this and whether there is any value in the exercise of keeping a blog, especially lately when all I have been doing is moping.

I am well aware that, unless you suffer from the same kind of impairment, reading about someone's rotten mood gets tired real soon. I know there are people who used to visit me often and have now moved on to more chemically balanced bloggers. And I do not blame them. Most people who do not suffer from mood disorders feel sorry for those of us who do. And they can only take so much before they either get impatient with the sad person who can't get out of their mood, or just lose interest. I know I have little patience for people who seem stuck in a rut, even though often I am in the same situation.

I have said it before and I will say it again: when I write about my mood I am not looking for pity; I don't want it and I don't think I am deserving of it. I worry sometimes that people may read the blog and think that I am a complete emotional wreck. And yes, sometimes I am a wreck. I get very sensible and get angry or cry for the slightest reason. But most of the time, even when I feel emotionally on edge, I behave like a normal person. I go to my job and perform all my duties. I take care of my family. In fact, sometimes I feel this curse gives my life depth, but that may just be something I tell myself to see the value in everything.

8 comments:

  1. Ingrid, yo leo tu blog porque me encanta lo que escribes y como lo escribes. Tienes una habilidad única de expresar de manera sencilla y directa lo que piensas y sientes. Continúa haciendo lo que te gusta, no te desanimes, por favor. Como tú misma has dicho, mantener el blog es una de la mejores maneras de desahogarte y hasta te sirva de terapia.

    ¡Sigue adelante!

    Un abrazo,

    Enid

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  2. I understand the ups and downs and those feelings that come out of nowhere and try to overwhelm us. I read your blog all the time and will continue - you make sense to me. Just like me, you continue with the routines of your life as best you can, regardless of whether your heart is into it at the moment. Really, what other choice do we have? To curl up in a corner? I don't think so, not for me and not for you! I understand that you are not looking for pity or sympathy, only venting a little and documenting your journey. Please don't stop blogging, I adore you! There are always brighter days to come!

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  3. hey girl... I like YOUR blog..A LOT.

    and thats just what this is....this is YOUR BLOG about YOUR LIFE and YOUR feelings.

    I bitch, moan, complain, cry, whine, and am forever sick from one thing or another.

    Your blog speaks to me on many levels. I'd really hate to see you leave us.

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  4. Hey! You blog about what you want. Sometimes it pains me to see you so unhappy, but I'll still come!

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  5. Hey Ingrid. I read...but dont' always comment, as I am uncertain of what to say sometimes. I am a very even keeled person, so it is hard for me to relate to having such changing deep moods, but you help me learn to be more understanding of this.
    hugs!

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  6. Thanks for all the kind words. I am committed to the blog, so even if I feel doubts, I will continue to write.

    Enid, gracias, amiga. Siempre aprecio tus comentarios

    Josie and Meleah, thanks. I do identify with both of you a lot, and I am glad my blog resonates with you.

    Lori and Corey, I love you both and I am glad you keep on coming, my friends. Sometimes I worry about putting people off with all the gloom and doom. Just know that the mood swings are second nature to me, and that as deep as I fall, I tend to bounce back pretty quickly. Lately I have noticed the swings are more marked, and I may check with a doctor in case there is something extra going on.

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  7. hey i still come by your blog and read...may not comment EVERY time..but i dont care if you moan and bitch every single post... because you dont! LOL..dont worry..these blogging doldrums will pass..as with everything else.

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  8. Hey Ingrid, I love your blog too. I completely relate to EVERYTHING you wrote...Sometimes I wont post for fear of scaring readers away with whatever funk I’m in (I know some have disappeared completely)….But what then, is the purpose of a blog if not to let go of what ever is bothering you? I can only speak for my self when I say that I am a fan—not the chatty, super commenting type—but a fan none the less.

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