The Three Word Wednesday words for today are: Indifferent, Pour, Reason
I woke up early again today. I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat down at the computer for a while. It is nice to have this quiet time to myself. Then I woke up Gabe and brought him some coffee, and I woke up Isabel to get her ready for bed. It's Splash Day today at daycare, so she was excited. She wanted to make sure we brought Mr. Octopus to school, because he is her friend. Mr. Octopus is a baby towel, one of those with hoods. There is an Octopus design on the hood, complete with tentacles that graze her forehead when we put the hood on. She's had Mr. Octopus since she was born, and she loves him.
I suppose I could work from home if I wanted to. My boss is working from his home today and I could take advantage of that and work remotely. But I am indifferent about staying home today. I can tell I am not in the midst of one of my depression spells, becase I do not mind at all going into the office today. In fact, I am looking forward to being on campus today.
Days like this are evidence that my dark periods are not the product of reason, but are bio-chemically driven. There is nothing different about my circumstances today than what they were a few weeks ago. We are still dealing with the same stresses at work and daily life, but somehow the looming terror of being shamed and destitute is absent from my mind. I do not want to run away screaming if I go to the cafeteria. I just show up, do my job and kid around with my cubicle neighbors.
I am feeling happy today, and it is not due to anything specific. I just am. And it's a great feeling.