At work they love me. I am so efficient, so quick, so supportive. I always, always have a good attitude. I get things done. I take "ownership" of projects, instead of merely doing tasks. I strive to be firm, but conciliatory, and to not get too personal. I have earned the flexibility to work from home when I need to, because my bosses know it is quite easy to reach me if they have to.
Lately it has been a harder struggle than usual to be the model employee that I am. I am juggling multiple projects with conflicting deadlines. I have been managing crucial projects and it has been quite complex to coordinate deliverables with such a large group of people who need to be involved. People come out of the woodwork asking for things, and I often find it hard to say no, because what they are asking for is part of the services I am supposed to provide, and they need them now. My boss told me yesterday to send all my internal clients an e-mail letting them know what my priorities are this week, so they know where they stand. In the past I have found it easier to just do what they want, but I may have to do as he suggests, because the requests keep growing in number. It is an understatement to say that my stress levels at work have gone up. When the work day is over, I feel spent and mentally depleted.
Throw in a screaming toddler, a fickle and defiant nine year-old girl, a house in disarray, and sleep deprivation into the mix, and you have a recipe for disaster. If my parents were not here, I am sure Gabriel and I would have been at each other's throats during this whole flooring project. Lately all Paula and I do is fight. She is in a very challenging stage right now, and is relentlessly pushing me to the limit.
I really need my two weeks vacation. I don't want to be this stressed out, angry and melodramatic person that I become when I am home. I can't wait to have some time to regroup and spend quality time with my family.