She's bored. Life these days leaves her numb. She's angry, so very angry. She hates the person she has to be at work, to survive. Lately she hates her job. She hopes this will pass.
More than anything, she is tense. In a few months she will officially be a middle-aged person. This is it. There is no escaping, no shortcuts. She is a grown-up, and there is no one to bail her out. It's the weight of the world that is wearing her down.
And yet she knows that, compared to others, she is doing so well. She has a job with a good salary and benefits. Never mind that the benefits keep on shrinking and the cost of life goes up faster than her salary can keep up with. At least she is getting a paycheck.
She can almost picture the comments on her blog. Be grateful for what you have. But grateful to whom, if not to herself? No one has given her any of this. She has worked hard for what she has, so if she wants to bitch a little bit, she should be entitled to.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
Monday Morning Dread
I was on vacation all of last week. Today is my first day back at work. My daughter is still off school until tomorrow, so today I am working from home.
As I log into the office netwrok and await for my e-mail inbox to be updated, I am filled with a sense of dread. I do not know what awaits me, what fires need to be put out.
I wonder how many people going back to work after Spring Break feel the same.
NOON UPDATE: Things are going along OK. There were no trainwrecks waiting for my return, thankfully. There is work to do, but no emergencies so far. I am catching up and doing conference calls.
As I log into the office netwrok and await for my e-mail inbox to be updated, I am filled with a sense of dread. I do not know what awaits me, what fires need to be put out.
I wonder how many people going back to work after Spring Break feel the same.
NOON UPDATE: Things are going along OK. There were no trainwrecks waiting for my return, thankfully. There is work to do, but no emergencies so far. I am catching up and doing conference calls.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Sunday night
My new obsession, which I need to listen to over and over again, is the theme from the movie 3:10 to Yuma (the 2007 version). I watched the movie today on pay-per-view and I fell in love with the music. The soundtrack fits the movie so well that sometimes you are not even aware the music is there, setting the tone scene after scene.
I am not a fan of Westerns. Traditional Westerns are too testosterone-driven for my taste. But I liked 3:10 to Yuma, just as I liked Unforgiven when it came out sixteen years ago. Both films moved me and provoked a strong emotional reaction.
I am not a fan of Westerns. Traditional Westerns are too testosterone-driven for my taste. But I liked 3:10 to Yuma, just as I liked Unforgiven when it came out sixteen years ago. Both films moved me and provoked a strong emotional reaction.
Holy
When I was little, growing up in Puerto Rico, there was no way of avoiding or ignoring Holy Week. Even if I did not go to church, even if I was being raised by an atheist, I knew what Easter was all about. You could not help it. Puerto Rico's culture is very much drenched in religious tradition. Holy Week is a big deal. Everybody goes to the church via crucis on Good Friday. Absolutely nothing else happened that day. There was no school, no work, no stores open, and the only thing playing endlessly on the 4 TV channels we had was old movies about Jesus' crucifixion and resurrection. My favorite was El Martir del Calvario, which I watched over and over (and rolled my eyes at) throughout my formative years. I don't recall much of it now, other than the fact that it was incredibly cheesy and over the top melodramatic.
I do not go to church by choice. I do not consider myself a Christian, although I was baptized Catholic and attended both Baptist and Catholic schools. I do not believe in Heaven and Hell. Sure, there is good and evil in this world, but not due to the influence of angels and demons. I don't believe we need a book to tells us what is wrong and what is right. I am grateful I am in this world, and I intend to make the best of this life I have, because once it is over, that's it for me. My role in life is to live the best way I can, without hurting others or taking advantage of them. I guess you could say I believe in secular spirituality.
Consistent with this is the way I am raising my children. I am trying to teach them to treat others with respect and compassion, to not be greedy, to look inside them for the light and to appreciate the wonders of life. They do not need to have the fear of a Christian God in them to be good people.
My daughter, Paula, does not know much about Easter, or about the story of Jesus. She vaguely knows that Jesus is the son of God, but she does not know the details of his story. I found out about this last night, as Gabe and I were watching some History Channel documentary on the life of Jesus, and Paula started asking questions about how he died and what had been done to him. I realized my daughter was blissfully ignorant about his plight, and that has been on my mind since. Is it my duty to teach her about this? Should she be aware of the basic tenets of Christianity, as a strong element of the culture we are immersed in? Should I teach her so that she has the right framework to understand the cultural waters we are navigating?
I do not go to church by choice. I do not consider myself a Christian, although I was baptized Catholic and attended both Baptist and Catholic schools. I do not believe in Heaven and Hell. Sure, there is good and evil in this world, but not due to the influence of angels and demons. I don't believe we need a book to tells us what is wrong and what is right. I am grateful I am in this world, and I intend to make the best of this life I have, because once it is over, that's it for me. My role in life is to live the best way I can, without hurting others or taking advantage of them. I guess you could say I believe in secular spirituality.
Consistent with this is the way I am raising my children. I am trying to teach them to treat others with respect and compassion, to not be greedy, to look inside them for the light and to appreciate the wonders of life. They do not need to have the fear of a Christian God in them to be good people.
My daughter, Paula, does not know much about Easter, or about the story of Jesus. She vaguely knows that Jesus is the son of God, but she does not know the details of his story. I found out about this last night, as Gabe and I were watching some History Channel documentary on the life of Jesus, and Paula started asking questions about how he died and what had been done to him. I realized my daughter was blissfully ignorant about his plight, and that has been on my mind since. Is it my duty to teach her about this? Should she be aware of the basic tenets of Christianity, as a strong element of the culture we are immersed in? Should I teach her so that she has the right framework to understand the cultural waters we are navigating?
Friday, March 21, 2008
Test of the day
 | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Which animal totem best suits you? created with QuizFarm.com | ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| You scored as Wolf You are the Wolf. When you are with someone, your allegience never falters. Your family is very important to you and you will protect that family with all you have, no matter what.
|
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)