I had a huge scare yesterday

OK, first the normal stuff

Ugh. Saturday I was halfway through a blog post on my day. Nothing particularly thrilling, but posting out of discipline. I was telling about the open house and listing my menu for Thanksgiving, among other things. Then I had to get up because Isa was getting into some mischief, and I never saved the draft. Well, Gabe sat down to use the computer and logged me out so he could get in. My post was lost. I hate when that happens.

So, to start again, the open house was nice. Several people from the Chamber of Commerce showed up, a few friends and former co-workers, some clients, even Gabe's priest from his old high-school.Everybody thought Isa was adorable. For the most part she behaved good, although she grabbed a couple of things with dirty hands and I was concerned. Gabe thought she did alright. She also had a tendency to dash out the door and roam around the building, so we had to follow her. But I wasn't the only one keeping an eye on her. My in-laws helped. I did have a chance to have some wine and chat with other people. It was good.

I got a new computer through the employee purchase program at work. I love it. But I'll talk about it some other time. More pressing matters are at hand.

Moving on to the big scare I had yesterday

I have been hitting myself on the head since yesterday afternoon. I usually keep the cleaning supplies on a cabinet that has one of those childproof locks. Well, yesterday I was cleaning the study, making way for the new computer I bought, and took out a bottle of Old English furniture oil and set it on top of the counter. This bottle had no cap because we had somehow lost it. Well, I turn my back for a moment, and Isabel grabbed the bottle and put it in her mouth! When I saw her she was spitting out, trying to get the bad taste out of her tongue. I do not know for sure if she only had a taste or if she drank from it. It looked like it was only a taste, though, because of her reaction and because she did not have oodles of oil in her mouth. Still, I was terrified. I called poison control immediately. They instructed me to give her something to drink (non-carbonated, non fatty), so she got some orange juice, which she welcomed very much. They asked if she was gagging, coughing or looked like she has trouble breathing, which she wasn't. They also told me what the risks are (if any of the oil was aspired and gets to her lungs she can develop a chemical pneumonia) , and called back after two hours to follow up on her condition. Isabel was not gagging, and looked normal the whole time (well, she was a bit congested, but that was before the oil). When they called back, they told me she probably was OK based on what I was seeing, but to watch her for the next 24 hours in case she started coughing, wheezing or developed a fever. She already was congested to begin with, so they said I had to look for something beyond her current baseline.

I felt so bad, so ashamed. I should have known better. I was alone here when it happened, just Paula, Isa and me. I was scared, trying to conceal my freaking out so Paula would not get more upset (did not do a great job), and I did not know who to call for support. I called Gabe (he was at the office yesterday), and he was upset when I told him. He did not say it then, he just cut the call short. I did not want to call my mom, because I would end up consoling her instead of getting some support. I did not know who else to call without sounding intrusive or opportunistic. I never call people to chat, so I felt like it was not right to call for this. I know this is stupid, and that my friends from the Mommy Board are going to tell me I should have called someone. And I should have, that is why we are a support network. But I just did not know who to call, and I felt so ashamed.

Isa coughed a little in her sleep just twenty minutes ago. I bolted awake. She has coughed a bit at night on recent nights, her cold symptoms linger on. On the one hand, my instinct says it's more of what I have been observing, but on the other hand I can't get the phrase "chemical pneumonia" out of my head. I am going to drop her off at daycare, call her doctor and make an appointment for later today, just to make sure.